Where is your “Sweet Spot?”
Spring has sprung, finally! For me, it was one long, cold, wet winter here in SoCal & I am ready for SUNSHINE! Another beautiful season of warmth, outdoor activities (to keep us on the go) and friends we’ve yet to meet, is upon us. (Did someone say Pickleball?) Each season is a new beginning. And I can’t help but wonder; what mental seeds have you planted that you anticipate to blossom? Any? Maybe you are metaphorically planting now, expecting a fall harvest? Whichever you choose, or have chosen, consciously or unconsciously, it all takes effort, time, thought. I am awaiting my garden to grow myself, having spent a few years watering , loving and caring for it…”OMG, was that a sprout?”
Over the past few months, I have spent some time consciously thinking about my personal “sweet spot” for my life. My day to day living & what does that really look like? How does it feel? What does it entail? It didn’t start off as a conscious thought process. The entire thought sort of just snuck up on me, while working diligently on my massive manifestation “to do list” for 2019.
Many of us, no matter what we do, usually have a “have to get it done” agenda or to do list… Mine, keeps “my crazy” at a nice comfortable distance. However, at some point in March, I had a massive feeling of overwhelm. Ugh! Not now, I told myself, I’ve got stuff to get done! Time’s a tickin’! Right? There’s always SO much for all of us, never mind adding in kids, S.O’s, jobs, hobbies, friends etc… well, I mentally crashed! A mental feeling of lethargy hit me like a ton of bricks. I just stopped doing my list … and temporarily tried on the ol’ couch potato outfit. (ok, I don’t ever sit on the couch, I don’t even have cable! It’s really like Amazon Prime & a Lavender Bubble bath) I have to say, for a bit, it fit quite nicely. (insert happy face) It felt great to just chill out, allow myself to watch, read, bubble, play and most importantly, NOT feel guilty about not moving at 100mph… to allow myself to “just be”. I will admit, it was definitely awkward feeling in the very beginning…(like new heels that pinch, but make you feel oh, so glam) but as my mind & body came down from my overwhelm, I started to feel like my old self again. haaaaa….I could breathe without an O2 mask-
So, fast forward to a sunny day with my BFF in LA. Lunch at the Montage (to die for)
(OMG, was that Britney Spears?) oceanside view, champagne & delectable seafood appetizers. The sun shined on us, lunch was uh-mazing, warm sunny day, chillin’ with my peeps…Um, why the hek do I not do this more often? Umm, I live in SoCal!?? Why do I push myself to the point of mental stagnation? Do you know what my girl said to me? “Madison, how about asking yourself; what would I like to do today” vs. I should, I need, I have to, blah, blah…” OMG! Light bulb moment! How about “try easy” Madison? …are you kidding me? Could it really be that much of an epiphany?! … In case you’re wondering, let me help you – “Hell Ya!” I can’t even begin to tell you just how much of a difference that phrase has made in my life. Here’s the real kicker, drum roll… the exact same thing was said to me on my very first yoga retreat in Tulum, MX in 2002…It made a massive impact in my life then and it does again now. I just needed to be “re-minded”. A mental version of a software update… Madison 3.0! It refreshed my memory of just how we (humans) have deep programmed habits, ingrained in our DNA. The Buddhists call this “samskara”…(grooves or imprints in the mind that have a life of their own. Your personal samskaras, built up from memories of the past)
I was amazed that I had not only forgotten such a very important lesson but also that I had allowed myself to slide back into that level of crazy. So, a few missing months of blog posts, some amazing sleep, a more balanced approach to my life.
Remember the Tortoise & the Hare? Well, as much as I hate to admit it, I’m more the Hare, going 100mph, only instead of being so confident I will win, and napping, I burn myself out, mentally & physically. The result, is I actually lose time to be productive, because I crash as hard as I go. Not actually a smart philosophy, proven over & over again. I have a few friends that have done the same thing. When am I and when are we, going to truly learn this is not a helpful modus operandi? For me, it took this last crash of lethargy mentally & physically. For a friend, it took being put in the hospital for 21days-, for another friend, it took emptying the recycling and counting the wine bottles…
Here is the down-low, keeping it real, from my heart with love; “these are all first world problems” …Nothing, and I mean nothing is that important that we can not slow down and enjoy the daily blessings we have. So, because you’re my peeps, and I don’t want you to make the same mistakes I have made..I have created a list of 10 work life balance tips that you can implement right now to start living a more stress free & joyful life daily…
- Take more rejuvenation time…I can not share with you enough the medicinal benefits of a Lavender bubble bath! Both mentally & physically-
- Let go of FEAR…Fear-less, it’s not real anyway. It’s the mental perception we give to something unknown. It’s the same energy as excitement. The only difference is the label you give it!
- Prioritize your day… Let’s face it. No matter who you are or what you do, the list is always going to be there. What actually HAS to get done today? It’s not brain surgery, it can probably roll over to tomorrow’s list-
- Express Gratitude DAILY… this one is huge, el grande, massive! It is imperative to express gratitude for all the blessings we have in our lives now. By showing that you are grateful for what you presently have, you invite the energy of the Universe to give you more…
- Use the word NO often…and use it without guilt. NO, such an underused word. I have finally found the beauty of this word for myself & my life. It’s a very freeing feeling. Now, I don’t mean to use it negatively, but just the opposite. I use it when I feel that it doesn’t not serve me in my highest level to say YES for fear of hurting someone’s feelings. I just use it with heart, and I don’t explain myself either- there’s NO need to explain. IE; “I would love to but I have to get the blah, blah, and Blah blah has a thing etc…” Nope, No more. Now I comfortably say & mean with heart; “Thank you so very much for thinking of me. That means a lot. Unfortunately, that won’t work me now. Thanks very much for understanding” …Nothing else needs to be said. I know plenty that make up white lies and then feel guilty so why bother? Just keep it clean, real and with sincere heart-
- Have more FUN!…This is a biggie or at least it was for me. I felt so guilty for having fun, when I knew I had still so many boxes to check off my list. Not anymore. The fact is this: I have become MUCH more grounded, at peace, happy and calm, now that I have allowed myself moments/days of fun! Feed your mind, body and soul & there is so much more of you to feed what & who you love! I promise that-
- Write it down…Whether journaling is your thing or not, maybe a napkin at the coffee shop or even the steam on the glass shower door, it doesn’t matter! Get it out of your head & down on to something else. This has scientifically been proven to alleviate stress, help you sleep etc…Scientific evidence supports that journaling provides unexpected benefits. The act of writing accesses your left brain, which is analytical and rational. While your left brain is occupied, your right brain is free to create, intuit and feel. Meaning, writing removes mental blocks and allows you to use all of your brainpower to better understand yourself, others and the world around you. BA-ZINGA! Just sayin’…
- Create time each day to relax…Whether it’s 10min in the morning before roll call or 10min in the car prior to pick up/drop off, Claim your time! Just chill it out. Deep breathe, its 10minutes! We spend more time at Starbucks waiting for our lattes!! (ps. I LOVE Starbucks, no judgement)
- Have a chat with the Chic in the mirror… “Hello Be-You-tiful! You Go-Girl! Whatever it takes… You look her dead in the eyes, have a chat (I don’t care if you lock yourself in the bathroom to do this) Trust me on this! One of the MOST powerful exercises you can ever do for yourself! It’s amazing how effective this is. It shows us that “she is me” and it will get you out of your head and into your heart…LOVE THYSELF FIRST!
- Give a hug, offer a smile, to someone you don’t know EVERY day…We never ever know what someone else is going thru- they can wear a smile all day long, take care of us, offer us advice, give us a hug, and they themselves can be in so much pain or hurt inside…this one I know for sure- I could list you a thousand examples of this one. So, be like NIKE, just do it- You’ll be glad you did –
For me, I have found that it’s the little things that matter most…My “sweet spot” is balance. I need balance like I need the air to breathe. Too much stimulus shuts me down quicker than a cold shower kills my mojo! (was that TMI?) By keeping my new list in check, I am operating at a more “balanced pace”, far more happier, both mentally & physically, with check marks in many columns instead of just one…I sure hope you find your sweet spot. It adds a great deal of bliss to an already pretty blessed life. Who doesn’t want more of that?! (check out the peeps w/amazing balance) GIRL POWER!
As always… keeping it real, as best I can, with an immense amount of gratitude in my heart for all of you- Send me a note, tell me what you think, how you feel, what tips do you have to share? We are always so much stronger together…
Peace, Love & Massive Gratitude-